Townsville, Australia

Saturday, March 9, 2019

We’re now heading north up the west coast of Australia. I’m excited to visit some places I heard about all my life but have never seen. Townsville is one of them.

Where am I?

So, what’s been happening?

Townsville is an interesting little place in Queensland. Like most communities in Queensland, Townsville seems to rely upon tourism to fuel its economic engine. At least until 3pm on a Saturday.

• 

• 

The downtown area of Townsville is full of little stores and shops, some of which cater to very narrow interests. I just had to go in when I walked by a shop that was advertising this:

I don’t know much about this game other than the miniatures that you use to play it look pretty cool. And here’s another thing that I found odd: the only game that the store sold was Warhammer 40,000 and its various add-ons. I guess this game must have a huge customer base in order to keep the doors of a store open when it sells only this one game. I dunno, but if you want further information I suggest you contact Matt Danger Tolle.

So, why was I walking around downtown Townsville? I had been looking forward to my visit to Townsville for a couple of reasons.

Reason #1 – Fast Internet

The Internet aboard ship is atrocious. The service I receive on board is nothing like what they told me in the sales brochure. I suppose I should have seen that coming.

The problem with slow Internet at sea is that it becomes very difficult to upload photos for this blog. The upload process times out and it takes many, many, many retry attempts to get a single photo uploaded. This takes a lot of time and I find that I spend vacation time waiting for uploads to complete instead of reading a book, rewatching Game of Thrones, or just getting three sheets to the wind! (See that? I worked in a nautical term! Excuse me while I take just a moment to feel clever.)

OK, that’s enough of that. Let’s get back to business.

So, when I come ashore I like to find a place that has fast Internet so that I can upload the photos that I had taken two to four days prior. However, sitting in some library or museum just to upload photos means that I’m not out exploring. I think you can see my dilemma.

Now, if I could find a place with fast Internet that also is a point of interest to me, then that would make things better. Much better. So that leads me directly to reason #2.

Reason #2 – The Taphouse

I had been communicating with the good folks at The Taphouse in Townsville a few days before we arrived. I was hoping this would be a place where I good get a great IPA, some excellent pub grub, and enjoy some fast Internet.

I actually received several replies back from the staff of The Taphouse informing me that they could make all three of these things possible. Hooray! I mentally prepared myself to head into town, find this little place (it’s located in a pedestrian “alleyway” off of the main street in town), get a pint, upload photos, and maybe even get some writing done.

Well, I participated in all of those planned activities except one; I did not get any writing done. Here’s why.

While I was sitting at my table, who walks in but one of my ship’s crew buddies, Michael. Michael is a bartender on the Amsterdam and he is also a beer lover. He heard about this place as well and came in during his mid-day break to check it out. We had a couple of beers and talked about beers from around the world. It was great to have some company at lunch, even if it further delayed the next post to this blog.

The Taphouse has a very unusual feature that is worth mentioning here. They have a “serve yourself” system set up.

Now, this only makes sense if you’re a local, but here’s how the system works. You purchase an “ID” card of sorts. It’s programmed for your account and it’s about the size of a credit card. Once you have your card you can go up to any of the faucets found in the middle of the room. To the side of each faucet is a little black box with a screen, proclaiming the beer you receive if you use that faucet. You pick the beer you want, then you lay your Taphouse card on the screen. Then when you pull the tap handle, you get your beer. You can pour just a taster, a glass of any size, or a pitcher! You’re only charged for the amount of beer you pour.

The advantage to the cardholder is that you can try a sample of as many beers as you like without waiting for a bartender to set up a “paddle” for you. You also get immediate service (because you are your own service provider.) And finally, it’s kinda fun to pour your own beers from a tap.

While we chatted, Michael and I enjoyed a tray of charcuterie that was a nice mix of meats, cheeses, breads, and other goodies. All in all, The Taphouse turned out to be a great little place with great food and beer, but also with a great staff. And since I created such an excellent segue, I’d like to send a shout out to Jesse Marano who works at The Taphouse and is my newest friend on Untapped. Hey, Jesse! Thanks for making my visit to The Taphouse such a pleasant one!

So what are Robert’s beers of the day?

• 

• 

So, anything else interesting?

Well, since I know you’re keeping track of such things, I should tell you about the perils of walking on a city street while looking at the map app on your phone. If you don’t watch where you’re walking you might just find a hole in the sidewalk where a tree used to be. I did. I stepped right into it, then I flew right out of it.

So, now I’ve got a new injury to nurse. It’s not bad, just scraped up my foot and ankle a bit. Give it a couple of weeks and the bruise will be gone, too. Sorry, I don’t have any photos of this event.

And, this is also interesting (much more so than me lying on the sidewalk.) Townsville has some very attractive beaches, but you can’t just go out into the water. Oh, no. I have been told that, when choosing a beach swimming area, I need to look for those places that are fenced and guarded so as to keep me well separated from the natives. In this case, however, the natives are box jellies. (NOTE: Koalas are NOT bears. Jellies are NOT fish.)

When it’s jelly season (and that season is happening right now!) these beautiful sea creatures can be found in plentiful quantities along Queensland beaches. But it doesn’t take an army of box jellies to hurt you; we were told that a single animal has the potential to actually kill you.

My advice is to avoid the jellies altogether and find a place where you can safely enjoy a pint or three of quality brew.

So, what’s coming up?

We just have this one short day in Townsville. Tomorrow we sail through the Great Barrier Reef and then park this limousine in Cairns for the day.

That’s all for now, so I’ll be saying “G’day, mate!”